Naturally, a child with a soft and gentle voice, unable to retort, adults around me elevated this quality of being “good” and soft-spoken as an added virtue to my character. I found myself playing at friends’ houses, only to be used by their parents as a benchmark to educate them: “Don’t you see how kind she is? Why can’t you be like that?” If only they knew the mantra my mother would repeat to me before she said goodbye: “Always ask for permission, apologise, say please, and thank you – ALWAYS!” A repetitive chant, at times almost painful, which I took to heart and still hear echoing in my mind today.
