Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab (Invocation of an hour-long burning), Zeus Bascon and Con Cabrera
December 2023
Zeus Bascon, Fire, 2018. Photo by Marco Ugoy
Introduction | an excerpt of transcribed conversation recorded on October 18, 2023 as an extension of our podcast, titled Isang Oras.
The correspondence of text and images in this entry followed an outline prompted by the title, which thoughtfully involves an exercise of threading a timeline (from 2012 to 2016 until the present). The intent was to challenge ourselves to remember and evaluate ‘what was’ in order to open up opportunities for assessing ‘what is.’ Along with the changing atmosphere/s and landscape/s, this correlation between the roles we take as artists and as citizens has been a processual approach in our attempts to understand working and living, drawing paths onwards, and creating patterns that form a sense of the self and the whole.
Our habitual exchange as means to determining our current states of being:
Zeus Bascon: “Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab” – nandoon yung kagipitan ng oras, habang nangyayari ang lahat sa akin in the past months. Ang tanging pinanghahawakan ko lang doon sa nangyayari, sa tagal at iksi ng oras ay yung limitations ng anong pwede kong magawa. Sa buong nangyayari ngayon, gaano man kahaba s’yang tingnan sa umpisa, at kung gaano siyang kaiksi habang nangyayari, kung ano yung kaya kong magawa hanggang dun lang… ‘Yun yung hamon.
Kung sa English, “Invocation of an hour-long burning,” nandoon sa akin at first yung ritwal, summoning. Also because I am passionate and a competitive person, I want to make something good, if not better or best, should I call it craft? Ayoko naman siyang tawaging career lang, dahil nandoon lang din yung work and life, as always – as it has always been. Para siyang extra challenge na race dahil lang dun sa pursuit to do good work. ‘Yun yung sa akin kung ba’t laging unang tanong: ano yung offer? Ano yung io-offer mo? Will you burn? It's just yourself.
So doon sa may umpisa ‘yung Tagalog, nandoon yung “at the moment,” yung in action, making do of the situation at that time, at yung mismong hamon doon: hindi talaga maiksi ang isang oras. Hindi rin siya ganun ka-flexible depende sa intensity ng nangyayari. With the invocation, matagal siya: para siyang slow burning. O ikaw paano mo sasagutin ‘yung dalawa?
Con Cabrera: Doon sa “Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab,” yung hamon as challenge, hamon as parang prompt. Tapos 'pag sinabi mong pagliliyab, sisilaban mo muna bago siyang lumaki. 'Pag lumiliyab na siya, malaki na siya. Build-up siya na kailangan mong gawin sa loob ng isang oras. Parang may urgency, ‘di ba? Parang kailangan mo s’yang gawin quick, fast! Tapos kailangan mo i-make sure na 'yung pagliliyab ay pwede mong tawaging nagliliyab. Ibig sabihin, malaki dapat, significant yung scale nung fire. Yung relation doon sa mga ganap, parang 'yung sinasabing mo rin na kung paano tayo mag-operate lately: quick and fast, pero me-make sure mo na liyab talaga.
Pero merong factor of scale yung sayo.
Oo. Maliit muna siya, lalaki siya, which always comes from proseso ‘di ba? Litaw 'yung proseso sa pagliliyab. Kaya parang nandoon ako sa point na ano ba 'yung natututunan ko sa ginagawa ko? Laging nandoon din sa proseso. Ganito pala ‘yun, ganito pala dapat. Bakit naging ganito? Gusto ko 'yung term na pagliliyab kasi hindi siya fully-formed versus doon sa English na ‘burning.’ When you say burning, there's a certain consistency of the flame. It can be a small fire that is continually burning, but it can be a big fire that can also be consistently burning. Pero if it’s large enough, it could be dangerous. Parang a big burning, consistently overtime, kailangan na apulahin!1 “Invocation of an hour-long burning” has a lot of limitations, at the same time, because consistency can sometimes be boring, ‘di ba?
Habang sinasabi mo yung word na burning and in comparison sa scale sa pagliliyab, iba na ang burning sa malaking scale ng pagliyab talaga. Hindi na siya burning; it's an inferno! ‘Yun yung nasa isip ko. Pero doon sa hour of burning, andoon ‘yung pag-retain, pag-sustain, which also relates to process or practice.
True. Kaya if you illustrate process, it can go both ways. It’s difficult to maintain or sustain both a build-up and/or consistency. To be consistent, hirap noon! To be building-up, mahirap din kasi pwede kang mag-degrade, pwedeng bumaba energy mo. Pero pag sinabi mong build-up, dapat pataas nang pataas. Pareho siyang mahirap.
In relation naman sa pagiging magkapareha at magkaiba ng dalawang phrases and for them not being bilingual, nakikita ko rin na it also relates to how we involve ourselves not just in our own practices. As artists na meron tayong sariling sets of thoughts, ideas, experiences, at meron pa tayong nilalaang oras, enerhiya, at pakialam dun sa labas pa ng sarili, mare-relate ko din sa may burning na consistent at ‘tsaka yung scale ng apoy.
Na pareho rin merong external factors, ‘di ba nakakaapekto sila doon sa flames na yun?
Like wind!
'Yung environment mo around surrounding it…
Seasons, time…
Ang isang oras na tinutukoy ko sa simula ay 'yung recent months, na parang sa tingin mo na ang haba ng oras na yon, sabihin nating tatlo o apat na buwan, pero sa buwan na 'yun, ilan 'yung ginagawa mo nang sabay-sabay? Hanggang sa dumadaan ang oras, papalapit nang papalapit ‘yung deadlines mo, tapos doon siya nangyayari. Doon sa may kabila naman, iniisip ko 'yung mas long-term.
‘Yung puwedeng maraming mangyari sa hour, ganyan.
Ako inisip ko, kapag nagka-opportunity ako pag-usapan yung sarili ko, sa porma ng artist talk or presentation, parang doon lagi kang pipili. Titingnan mo, “Ah, eto na pala!”
Ilalatag mo, hahanapin mo, tapos makikita mo zooming out: ito na pala yun. Sa napaka-fast-paced nating buhay lately, 'yung tinitingnan kong idea ng isang oras, hour-long, relative na pagtingin natin sa oras, ano ba ang isang oras sa buhay mo? Kasi minsan ang bilis ng isang oras, minsan ang tagal niya. Halimbawa, bumiyahe ako simula QC to CCP, kulang ang isang oras. Ang haba! Pero 'pag nagklase ka ng one hour, bitin! So, napakarelative sa sitwasyon, sa current moment, at sa pangangailangan ng moment na 'yun. Parang ibang usapin 'yung hour o oras o time doon sa burning, pero napaka-intertwined nila doon sa ginagawa.
The correspondence of text and images in this entry followed an outline prompted by the title, which thoughtfully involves an exercise of threading a timeline (from 2012 to 2016 until the present). The intent was to challenge ourselves to remember and evaluate ‘what was’ in order to open up opportunities for assessing ‘what is.’ Along with the changing atmosphere/s and landscape/s, this correlation between the roles we take as artists and as citizens has been a processual approach in our attempts to understand working and living, drawing paths onwards, and creating patterns that form a sense of the self and the whole.
Our habitual exchange as means to determining our current states of being:
Zeus Bascon: “Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab” – nandoon yung kagipitan ng oras, habang nangyayari ang lahat sa akin in the past months. Ang tanging pinanghahawakan ko lang doon sa nangyayari, sa tagal at iksi ng oras ay yung limitations ng anong pwede kong magawa. Sa buong nangyayari ngayon, gaano man kahaba s’yang tingnan sa umpisa, at kung gaano siyang kaiksi habang nangyayari, kung ano yung kaya kong magawa hanggang dun lang… ‘Yun yung hamon.
Kung sa English, “Invocation of an hour-long burning,” nandoon sa akin at first yung ritwal, summoning. Also because I am passionate and a competitive person, I want to make something good, if not better or best, should I call it craft? Ayoko naman siyang tawaging career lang, dahil nandoon lang din yung work and life, as always – as it has always been. Para siyang extra challenge na race dahil lang dun sa pursuit to do good work. ‘Yun yung sa akin kung ba’t laging unang tanong: ano yung offer? Ano yung io-offer mo? Will you burn? It's just yourself.
So doon sa may umpisa ‘yung Tagalog, nandoon yung “at the moment,” yung in action, making do of the situation at that time, at yung mismong hamon doon: hindi talaga maiksi ang isang oras. Hindi rin siya ganun ka-flexible depende sa intensity ng nangyayari. With the invocation, matagal siya: para siyang slow burning. O ikaw paano mo sasagutin ‘yung dalawa?
Con Cabrera: Doon sa “Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab,” yung hamon as challenge, hamon as parang prompt. Tapos 'pag sinabi mong pagliliyab, sisilaban mo muna bago siyang lumaki. 'Pag lumiliyab na siya, malaki na siya. Build-up siya na kailangan mong gawin sa loob ng isang oras. Parang may urgency, ‘di ba? Parang kailangan mo s’yang gawin quick, fast! Tapos kailangan mo i-make sure na 'yung pagliliyab ay pwede mong tawaging nagliliyab. Ibig sabihin, malaki dapat, significant yung scale nung fire. Yung relation doon sa mga ganap, parang 'yung sinasabing mo rin na kung paano tayo mag-operate lately: quick and fast, pero me-make sure mo na liyab talaga.
Pero merong factor of scale yung sayo.
Oo. Maliit muna siya, lalaki siya, which always comes from proseso ‘di ba? Litaw 'yung proseso sa pagliliyab. Kaya parang nandoon ako sa point na ano ba 'yung natututunan ko sa ginagawa ko? Laging nandoon din sa proseso. Ganito pala ‘yun, ganito pala dapat. Bakit naging ganito? Gusto ko 'yung term na pagliliyab kasi hindi siya fully-formed versus doon sa English na ‘burning.’ When you say burning, there's a certain consistency of the flame. It can be a small fire that is continually burning, but it can be a big fire that can also be consistently burning. Pero if it’s large enough, it could be dangerous. Parang a big burning, consistently overtime, kailangan na apulahin!1 “Invocation of an hour-long burning” has a lot of limitations, at the same time, because consistency can sometimes be boring, ‘di ba?
Habang sinasabi mo yung word na burning and in comparison sa scale sa pagliliyab, iba na ang burning sa malaking scale ng pagliyab talaga. Hindi na siya burning; it's an inferno! ‘Yun yung nasa isip ko. Pero doon sa hour of burning, andoon ‘yung pag-retain, pag-sustain, which also relates to process or practice.
True. Kaya if you illustrate process, it can go both ways. It’s difficult to maintain or sustain both a build-up and/or consistency. To be consistent, hirap noon! To be building-up, mahirap din kasi pwede kang mag-degrade, pwedeng bumaba energy mo. Pero pag sinabi mong build-up, dapat pataas nang pataas. Pareho siyang mahirap.
In relation naman sa pagiging magkapareha at magkaiba ng dalawang phrases and for them not being bilingual, nakikita ko rin na it also relates to how we involve ourselves not just in our own practices. As artists na meron tayong sariling sets of thoughts, ideas, experiences, at meron pa tayong nilalaang oras, enerhiya, at pakialam dun sa labas pa ng sarili, mare-relate ko din sa may burning na consistent at ‘tsaka yung scale ng apoy.
Na pareho rin merong external factors, ‘di ba nakakaapekto sila doon sa flames na yun?
Like wind!
'Yung environment mo around surrounding it…
Seasons, time…
Ang isang oras na tinutukoy ko sa simula ay 'yung recent months, na parang sa tingin mo na ang haba ng oras na yon, sabihin nating tatlo o apat na buwan, pero sa buwan na 'yun, ilan 'yung ginagawa mo nang sabay-sabay? Hanggang sa dumadaan ang oras, papalapit nang papalapit ‘yung deadlines mo, tapos doon siya nangyayari. Doon sa may kabila naman, iniisip ko 'yung mas long-term.
‘Yung puwedeng maraming mangyari sa hour, ganyan.
Ako inisip ko, kapag nagka-opportunity ako pag-usapan yung sarili ko, sa porma ng artist talk or presentation, parang doon lagi kang pipili. Titingnan mo, “Ah, eto na pala!”
Ilalatag mo, hahanapin mo, tapos makikita mo zooming out: ito na pala yun. Sa napaka-fast-paced nating buhay lately, 'yung tinitingnan kong idea ng isang oras, hour-long, relative na pagtingin natin sa oras, ano ba ang isang oras sa buhay mo? Kasi minsan ang bilis ng isang oras, minsan ang tagal niya. Halimbawa, bumiyahe ako simula QC to CCP, kulang ang isang oras. Ang haba! Pero 'pag nagklase ka ng one hour, bitin! So, napakarelative sa sitwasyon, sa current moment, at sa pangangailangan ng moment na 'yun. Parang ibang usapin 'yung hour o oras o time doon sa burning, pero napaka-intertwined nila doon sa ginagawa.
Zeus Bascon, Trees Burn Down, 2012.
BURN
“Zeus Bascon’s works are attached to the bonds he has created, severed, and reconnected. Amidst closeness, phases of confusion, rituals and spirituals, his mother is a thriving wildflower. His works bear narratives of frustrations, interpretations of ideologies, and a liberation from inhibitions.”
(Excerpt from the exhibit text for Trees Burn Down, CC 2012)
“Zeus Bascon’s works are attached to the bonds he has created, severed, and reconnected. Amidst closeness, phases of confusion, rituals and spirituals, his mother is a thriving wildflower. His works bear narratives of frustrations, interpretations of ideologies, and a liberation from inhibitions.”
(Excerpt from the exhibit text for Trees Burn Down, CC 2012)
Trees. Burn. Down.
Ang sarili (The personal is political.)
Ano ‘yung term? ‘Yung maraming ikaw!
Kaya ito 'yung in-extract ko doon sa text, dahil sa bonds: friendships, relationships. Feeling ko, kung may bond tayo sa sarili natin, marami tayong beses na nadi-disconnect, reconnect. Kaya naka-emphasize dito, kasi noong period na to, Trees Burn Down (2012), hindi ka pa out. Tapos ako nasa loob pa ako ng collective. Dito ko gustong i-highlight yung kaibahan ng ‘noon’ na 2012 atsaka ‘ngayon.’
Actually, ano… [nagkwento ng ginhawang naranasan sa pag-uwi sa Laguna matapos ang isang stressful at emotional na raket] ‘di ba after nung nag alsa-balutan ako noong gabing yon, tapos umuwi ako agad ng Laguna… Kinabukasan, kung ba't din ako nakapagpakita ng ganoong kaganda, bílang ako, kasi may kaginhawaan na bumalik ako sa bahay, bumalik ako sa Laguna. Alam ko lang din, at that point na “Okay, dito ka na ulit, Zeus.”
Babalik at babalik ako doon sa Trees Burn Down (2012). Bilang pagkakakilanlan mo sa akin, hindi 'yun magiging iba, hindi 'yun magiging hiwalay sa akin: kung saan ako nakatira, kung saan ako nanggaling at tumubo.
Dati wala naman akong pake doon sa paglabas bilang queer. Alam ko meron akong desires. Siguro in that sense, merong pagtatago sa aparador. Pero ngayon, nag-180º na ganoon ko s’yang pag-usapan. Tapos ganun na rin akong ka-accepting of all of my desires and to be unapologetic about them.
Interesting din nitong mga huli. I'm being very explicit about queerness in my work.
‘Tsaka nakikita ko na ang swerte ko. Ang swerte ko ganito ‘yung mga taong nakapalibot sa akin. Ang na-surprise ako ay kung papaano 'yung blossoming?
Metaphor yan kasi after mag-burn down ng trees, nagbo-blossom.
Totoo… hindi ko rin akalain na aabot ako sa ganitong klaseng aspirations. Hindi lang with my desires, pero with my art.
Kung ikaw, mula sa loob papalabas, ang obvious ng journey mo dun sa queerness noh? Ako naman, mula sa labas papaloob kasi yung activism na kinagisnan ko sa kalsada, parang hindi pwedeng hindi ka sa kalsada. Aktibismo din naman 'yung nasa loob tayo ng bahay, ‘di ba?
Anong years mo yan dini-deal with yung ganung question ng level of commitment sa ideology?
Kasi noong 2012, paalis na ako doon sa collective. 2012 ako nag-[curate] ng Curved House.2 Para sa ‘kin, marker yung Curved House, kasi kasama doon sa pag-alis sa collective ay ang resignation ko sa day job. Kinasal din kami noong 2012.
Grabe Con, ngayon ko lang na-realize na talagang perfect circle sayo yung parang mula sa labas and I think, tuloy-tuloy yung conversation na parang how you value yourself and work that you do for yourself. Tama bang sabihin na meron kang ganung security?
Oo. Kasi syempre ‘pag nasa loob ka ng collective, brave ka antimano kasi may kasama ka. Kahit lang 'yung idea ng protesta sa kalsada dito, ganun eh, matapang ka. Magmu-mural ka diyan, hindi ka gagalawin ng pulis kasi may nagbabantay sa’yo. Pero kapag nag-e-express ka ng political ideas mo bilang isang individual, hindi ka part ng collective, ang vulnerable mo. May time na lagi kong dine-describe 'yung sarili ko bilang “inactive” na activist. Feeling ko activist pa din ako kasi sa mga pinapaniwalaan ko, pero dahil hindi na ako nasa loob ng collective, baka hindi na ako activist.
'Yung pagtatanong na iyon, parang doon siya nag-umpisa. Pero, kung ikaw naging parang queer na queer kumbaga, parang naging confident ako ‘tsaka activist pa rin ako parang ganun. Sa ngayon, kahit nandito ako sa bahay, kinailangan ko rin talaga siya trabahuhin, in terms of paggawa ng work, pag-educate sa sarili.
… at sa iba.
Oo, 'yung involvement ba. Kapag iniisip ko ngayon 'yung labas paloob, ‘yun talaga ‘yung feminist na na-miss kong pag-aralan noong nandoon ako sa collective. Kasi ang pinaglaanan ay basic ideology, 'yung mga ituturo sa'yo i-emphasize talaga nila 'yung need tsaka…
Objective…
Oo, na to be in a collective. Na ‘yun talaga yung buhay na parang magpapalaya sa’yo or something…
Hindi lang sa'yo, kundi sa lahat.
Oo, na ang feminism naman mas ini-emphasize niya 'yung ikaw, bilang sarili mo… and then tsaka ka lalabas doon, 'yung intersecting ang buhay mo sa buhay ng ibang mga kababaihan. ‘Yun siguro yung isa kong parang “Shet! Sana pinag-aralan ko ito nung nandoon ako.”
Doon sa to be in a collective?
Oo, parang kadalasan ang mga activists, ang first encounter nila to be political, artists or at least mga women artists ay maging feminists. Parang sa akin, hindi siya nangyari ng ganun masyado. Pero thinking of the question na “Kelan ka naging feminist?” parang mapi-pinpoint mo ba 'yung feminist awakening mo kung naka-integrate sa buhay mo na lumaki ka nang may malalakas na babae sa pamilya mo? Hindi ba 'yun feminist awakening? Siguro ang sa idea nila ay philosophical discourse, pagbabasa, or academic na…
Knowledge-seeking.
Oo, kapag babae ka na lumaki sa patriyarkal na society, ang feminist, ang feminism ay ganito na pag-realize na “Ay, ganito yung mundo!” ‘di ba?
Pero sa akin mahalaga 'yung na-own ko na din yung feelings (Feelings3). Siguro mas kapag nagkaka-artistic output ako, masaya ako. Kasi napaka-illustrative eh. Para kasing halimbawa: intelligence, hindi mo siya ma-illustrate. Definitely alam ko mas matalino ako ngayon dahil sa dami ng nabasa ko at pinag-isipan, pero I cannot illustrate that for you. Pero 'pag, di ba minark mo 'yung mga works, visual works, mas madali siyang intindihin.
Iyon, paloob 'yun. Tanda rin siya ng to be decisive. Kasi yung ‘collective decision’, collective siya eh… 'yung “to be decisive on your own,” sa’yo siya galing, even though maraming factors doon sa desisyon. Parang nag-a-assert siya ng independence na iyon, na sa tingin ko ay mahalaga.
Sabi mo 'yung being decisive, napakahalaga niyan: to be part of the collective’s decision and at the same time merong conscious choice to have that decision for one self. Kinakailangan ba talagang magkaroon ng ganoong paghiwalay sa collective, para lang ma-honor yung ganoong klaseng decision mo para sa sarili mo?
I think symbolic ‘yung nangyari sakin. ‘Tsaka necessity siya doon sa naging sitwasyon ko, dahil nagpakasal ako eh. Pero at the same time, I think lagi kong tina-try i-build, mag-build ng isang community or collective kung nasaan man ako ngayon. Kaya every project – kaya siguro ako nagkakaroon ng good relationships sa mga katrabaho ko – tina-try kong laging i-apply 'yung natutunan ko sa collective. Parang hinahanap mo pa rin naman, kasi may sense of comfort at masaya naman talaga ang maging sa collective. Napaka-enriching diba?
‘Yun 'yung gusto ko ding makita ko sa collective o collaborative work, na bukod doon sa comfort in numbers, nababantayan din 'yung flow ng ideas na nagmumula sa sarili to actually correct oneself or i-correct ka na ng iba, and maging okay lang sa pag-matanggap. Iyong ganoong klaseng corrections na feeling ko, if you're used to working alone, magiging issue siya.
Ang sarili (The personal is political.)
Mula sa loob, palabas (paghahayag ng queerness)
Mula sa labas, papaloob (independenteng aktibismo)
Ano ‘yung term? ‘Yung maraming ikaw!
Kaya ito 'yung in-extract ko doon sa text, dahil sa bonds: friendships, relationships. Feeling ko, kung may bond tayo sa sarili natin, marami tayong beses na nadi-disconnect, reconnect. Kaya naka-emphasize dito, kasi noong period na to, Trees Burn Down (2012), hindi ka pa out. Tapos ako nasa loob pa ako ng collective. Dito ko gustong i-highlight yung kaibahan ng ‘noon’ na 2012 atsaka ‘ngayon.’
Actually, ano… [nagkwento ng ginhawang naranasan sa pag-uwi sa Laguna matapos ang isang stressful at emotional na raket] ‘di ba after nung nag alsa-balutan ako noong gabing yon, tapos umuwi ako agad ng Laguna… Kinabukasan, kung ba't din ako nakapagpakita ng ganoong kaganda, bílang ako, kasi may kaginhawaan na bumalik ako sa bahay, bumalik ako sa Laguna. Alam ko lang din, at that point na “Okay, dito ka na ulit, Zeus.”
Babalik at babalik ako doon sa Trees Burn Down (2012). Bilang pagkakakilanlan mo sa akin, hindi 'yun magiging iba, hindi 'yun magiging hiwalay sa akin: kung saan ako nakatira, kung saan ako nanggaling at tumubo.
Dati wala naman akong pake doon sa paglabas bilang queer. Alam ko meron akong desires. Siguro in that sense, merong pagtatago sa aparador. Pero ngayon, nag-180º na ganoon ko s’yang pag-usapan. Tapos ganun na rin akong ka-accepting of all of my desires and to be unapologetic about them.
Interesting din nitong mga huli. I'm being very explicit about queerness in my work.
‘Tsaka nakikita ko na ang swerte ko. Ang swerte ko ganito ‘yung mga taong nakapalibot sa akin. Ang na-surprise ako ay kung papaano 'yung blossoming?
Metaphor yan kasi after mag-burn down ng trees, nagbo-blossom.
Totoo… hindi ko rin akalain na aabot ako sa ganitong klaseng aspirations. Hindi lang with my desires, pero with my art.
Kung ikaw, mula sa loob papalabas, ang obvious ng journey mo dun sa queerness noh? Ako naman, mula sa labas papaloob kasi yung activism na kinagisnan ko sa kalsada, parang hindi pwedeng hindi ka sa kalsada. Aktibismo din naman 'yung nasa loob tayo ng bahay, ‘di ba?
Anong years mo yan dini-deal with yung ganung question ng level of commitment sa ideology?
Kasi noong 2012, paalis na ako doon sa collective. 2012 ako nag-[curate] ng Curved House.2 Para sa ‘kin, marker yung Curved House, kasi kasama doon sa pag-alis sa collective ay ang resignation ko sa day job. Kinasal din kami noong 2012.
Grabe Con, ngayon ko lang na-realize na talagang perfect circle sayo yung parang mula sa labas and I think, tuloy-tuloy yung conversation na parang how you value yourself and work that you do for yourself. Tama bang sabihin na meron kang ganung security?
Oo. Kasi syempre ‘pag nasa loob ka ng collective, brave ka antimano kasi may kasama ka. Kahit lang 'yung idea ng protesta sa kalsada dito, ganun eh, matapang ka. Magmu-mural ka diyan, hindi ka gagalawin ng pulis kasi may nagbabantay sa’yo. Pero kapag nag-e-express ka ng political ideas mo bilang isang individual, hindi ka part ng collective, ang vulnerable mo. May time na lagi kong dine-describe 'yung sarili ko bilang “inactive” na activist. Feeling ko activist pa din ako kasi sa mga pinapaniwalaan ko, pero dahil hindi na ako nasa loob ng collective, baka hindi na ako activist.
'Yung pagtatanong na iyon, parang doon siya nag-umpisa. Pero, kung ikaw naging parang queer na queer kumbaga, parang naging confident ako ‘tsaka activist pa rin ako parang ganun. Sa ngayon, kahit nandito ako sa bahay, kinailangan ko rin talaga siya trabahuhin, in terms of paggawa ng work, pag-educate sa sarili.
… at sa iba.
Oo, 'yung involvement ba. Kapag iniisip ko ngayon 'yung labas paloob, ‘yun talaga ‘yung feminist na na-miss kong pag-aralan noong nandoon ako sa collective. Kasi ang pinaglaanan ay basic ideology, 'yung mga ituturo sa'yo i-emphasize talaga nila 'yung need tsaka…
Objective…
Oo, na to be in a collective. Na ‘yun talaga yung buhay na parang magpapalaya sa’yo or something…
Hindi lang sa'yo, kundi sa lahat.
Oo, na ang feminism naman mas ini-emphasize niya 'yung ikaw, bilang sarili mo… and then tsaka ka lalabas doon, 'yung intersecting ang buhay mo sa buhay ng ibang mga kababaihan. ‘Yun siguro yung isa kong parang “Shet! Sana pinag-aralan ko ito nung nandoon ako.”
Doon sa to be in a collective?
Oo, parang kadalasan ang mga activists, ang first encounter nila to be political, artists or at least mga women artists ay maging feminists. Parang sa akin, hindi siya nangyari ng ganun masyado. Pero thinking of the question na “Kelan ka naging feminist?” parang mapi-pinpoint mo ba 'yung feminist awakening mo kung naka-integrate sa buhay mo na lumaki ka nang may malalakas na babae sa pamilya mo? Hindi ba 'yun feminist awakening? Siguro ang sa idea nila ay philosophical discourse, pagbabasa, or academic na…
Knowledge-seeking.
Oo, kapag babae ka na lumaki sa patriyarkal na society, ang feminist, ang feminism ay ganito na pag-realize na “Ay, ganito yung mundo!” ‘di ba?
Pero sa akin mahalaga 'yung na-own ko na din yung feelings (Feelings3). Siguro mas kapag nagkaka-artistic output ako, masaya ako. Kasi napaka-illustrative eh. Para kasing halimbawa: intelligence, hindi mo siya ma-illustrate. Definitely alam ko mas matalino ako ngayon dahil sa dami ng nabasa ko at pinag-isipan, pero I cannot illustrate that for you. Pero 'pag, di ba minark mo 'yung mga works, visual works, mas madali siyang intindihin.
Iyon, paloob 'yun. Tanda rin siya ng to be decisive. Kasi yung ‘collective decision’, collective siya eh… 'yung “to be decisive on your own,” sa’yo siya galing, even though maraming factors doon sa desisyon. Parang nag-a-assert siya ng independence na iyon, na sa tingin ko ay mahalaga.
Sabi mo 'yung being decisive, napakahalaga niyan: to be part of the collective’s decision and at the same time merong conscious choice to have that decision for one self. Kinakailangan ba talagang magkaroon ng ganoong paghiwalay sa collective, para lang ma-honor yung ganoong klaseng decision mo para sa sarili mo?
I think symbolic ‘yung nangyari sakin. ‘Tsaka necessity siya doon sa naging sitwasyon ko, dahil nagpakasal ako eh. Pero at the same time, I think lagi kong tina-try i-build, mag-build ng isang community or collective kung nasaan man ako ngayon. Kaya every project – kaya siguro ako nagkakaroon ng good relationships sa mga katrabaho ko – tina-try kong laging i-apply 'yung natutunan ko sa collective. Parang hinahanap mo pa rin naman, kasi may sense of comfort at masaya naman talaga ang maging sa collective. Napaka-enriching diba?
‘Yun 'yung gusto ko ding makita ko sa collective o collaborative work, na bukod doon sa comfort in numbers, nababantayan din 'yung flow ng ideas na nagmumula sa sarili to actually correct oneself or i-correct ka na ng iba, and maging okay lang sa pag-matanggap. Iyong ganoong klaseng corrections na feeling ko, if you're used to working alone, magiging issue siya.
Zeus Bascon, Open Face (Fire! Fire), 2013-2016.
His work "Open Face" is a fire net, an entrapment device, he conceptualized to catch the santelmo. For him, the net will aid him in seizing the santelmo and the agimat that comes with it. Using the predominant manifestation of fire, he used foil tape, grommet and acrylic to mimic the tongues of flame, to catch fire with fire. The work comes with a self-portrait installed behind the net. A work on paper, it's a depiction of the artist with a welcoming aura that enchants spirits and elementals.
(Excerpt from Huwag Mong Huyagin ang Punong Walang Bunga exhibit text, CC 2016)
Mga naging pagtatangka sa paghuli ng santelmo at agimat mula 2016 hanggang kasalukuyan
Ang misyon (ano ang mga santelmo at mga agimat)
Ang misyon (ano ang mga santelmo at mga agimat)
Link to Jamboard
Kaganapan sa metapora ng paglalakbay
[Even while I'm awake, I am dreaming... not when my eyes are closed, but I am dreaming with my hands.]
Y
While I was washing my fingers off dirt, tired of toiling the ground for years, I envisioned a burning tree…
"Its crown was struck by lightning." said a snake, slithering from the pit I was just digging. "How did you know when you're beneath the earth?" I asked while the cunning coiled itself to a spiral, "I felt it."
"Were you there? Were you anywhere near when it happened?" as curious of how confident this animal spit an answer. The Snake unwinds itself and starts crawling, I followed. As we travel, its color changes every time I look at this spirited beast, "Who are you?" even curiouser when its skin becomes as fragile as glass. I hear only its hissing and scratching from the ground, "I am not afraid of you," my anxiety creeps in, "Of course, I am You!" ___I ran in confusion, but I wasn't afraid... I kept running, then the road seemed to be stretching longer and the trees grew taller! "I am not afraid!!!" exclaiming my confliction, stumbling to a hollow. I can feel the weight in my chest gasping for air. Suddenly, my hands and feet start swelling! My sweat is pouring, filling a puddle of my frustrations. I am not crying, "I am just exhausted..."
A shadow of a bird kept hovering around me, I felt fear. My frailed limbs try to carry my body off the ground, dragging a ditch in which my sweat flows forming a river. My abnormalities deflate but the burden of not knowing haunts my journey, still, as I passed by the ghost shed off by The Snake, ending with two heads.
Alas, reaching a tall singular figure, intensely darkened by sunset, is standing in front of me. It was the burning tree, marking a junction.
(ZB)
Beside the river, we live
Once there was a girl, she wrote a poem about a fish. Feeling so fulfilled, she thought “I think I can speak.” She grew up in a household where people did not know words or letters or expressions… all they knew was silence.
Once there was a family, they only knew how to live by living with others. They thought “We think we will live forever.” Their house was in a community that did not know there was a place beyond their town, nor a world beyond their island… all they knew was their place.
Once there was a town, it only knew how to breed fish. It thought “I will never go hungry.” It was surrounded by a river that did not know how to nourish the land, nor had streams for crops… all it knew was tides.
One day, the world was shaken by a string of meteors from the vastness of space. The girl, the family, and the town were taken by the earth and they all ended up in a burning city. This city did not have whatever they had in their old homes and prior locations, only flames and fire of varying degrees. The girl, having discovered sound and noise, started looking for places of silence. The family, having seen empty homes, started looking for people. The town, having seen land and concrete, started looking for bodies of water.
Three journeys towards fire and the unknown. Their stories never started.
(CC)
Mga aral na natutunan
CC:
ZB:
[Even while I'm awake, I am dreaming... not when my eyes are closed, but I am dreaming with my hands.]
Y
While I was washing my fingers off dirt, tired of toiling the ground for years, I envisioned a burning tree…
"Its crown was struck by lightning." said a snake, slithering from the pit I was just digging. "How did you know when you're beneath the earth?" I asked while the cunning coiled itself to a spiral, "I felt it."
"Were you there? Were you anywhere near when it happened?" as curious of how confident this animal spit an answer. The Snake unwinds itself and starts crawling, I followed. As we travel, its color changes every time I look at this spirited beast, "Who are you?" even curiouser when its skin becomes as fragile as glass. I hear only its hissing and scratching from the ground, "I am not afraid of you," my anxiety creeps in, "Of course, I am You!" ___I ran in confusion, but I wasn't afraid... I kept running, then the road seemed to be stretching longer and the trees grew taller! "I am not afraid!!!" exclaiming my confliction, stumbling to a hollow. I can feel the weight in my chest gasping for air. Suddenly, my hands and feet start swelling! My sweat is pouring, filling a puddle of my frustrations. I am not crying, "I am just exhausted..."
A shadow of a bird kept hovering around me, I felt fear. My frailed limbs try to carry my body off the ground, dragging a ditch in which my sweat flows forming a river. My abnormalities deflate but the burden of not knowing haunts my journey, still, as I passed by the ghost shed off by The Snake, ending with two heads.
Alas, reaching a tall singular figure, intensely darkened by sunset, is standing in front of me. It was the burning tree, marking a junction.
(ZB)
Beside the river, we live
Once there was a girl, she wrote a poem about a fish. Feeling so fulfilled, she thought “I think I can speak.” She grew up in a household where people did not know words or letters or expressions… all they knew was silence.
Once there was a family, they only knew how to live by living with others. They thought “We think we will live forever.” Their house was in a community that did not know there was a place beyond their town, nor a world beyond their island… all they knew was their place.
Once there was a town, it only knew how to breed fish. It thought “I will never go hungry.” It was surrounded by a river that did not know how to nourish the land, nor had streams for crops… all it knew was tides.
One day, the world was shaken by a string of meteors from the vastness of space. The girl, the family, and the town were taken by the earth and they all ended up in a burning city. This city did not have whatever they had in their old homes and prior locations, only flames and fire of varying degrees. The girl, having discovered sound and noise, started looking for places of silence. The family, having seen empty homes, started looking for people. The town, having seen land and concrete, started looking for bodies of water.
Three journeys towards fire and the unknown. Their stories never started.
(CC)
Mga aral na natutunan
CC:
ZB:
Zeus Bascon, The Arsonist, 2013–2018
Zeus Bascon, Fire! Fire! (Saving Memory), 2013–2018 (see first photo)
When theorist and philosopher Roland Barthes wrote his book about photography titled “Camera Lucida,” he did not only reflect on the form, but he also wrote it as a eulogy to his mother. He talked about the photograph as “the desired object, the beloved body.” He explained that it is “love…extreme love” that allows him to “erase the weight of the image” to make it “invisible,” to create a trail for him to view not the photograph but the object of his desire, his desire’s beloved body. In the same vein, here the artists stripped down the image and handled it with tenderness and thoughtfulness. To reset the clock, they had to extinguish the weight that burdens it and let it flow to its new cycle.
(Excerpt from Resetting the Clock exhibition text, CC 2018)
Current state of being: MIND MAP link
- Kasalukuyan at Hinaharap
- Mga handang silaban upang magpatuloy
- Hanggang saan ang pagliliyab
- Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab
- Kasalukuyan at Hinaharap
- Mga handang silaban upang magpatuloy
- Hanggang saan ang pagliliyab
- Hamon ng isang oras na pagliliyab
Zeus Bascon (b. 1987, lives and works in Sta. Rosa, Laguna) is a multi-disciplinary artist who has been participating in the exhibition circuit since 2006. He works mainly with the relationship of words and images, producing illustrated narratives layered with materiality, folklore, the supernatural, collaborations and the performative, translations/transformations/transmutations and 'what is queering?'. Bascon's participatory practice is being realized through Cultivating a Garden (started 2021 during Mountain Standard Time 10 residency program to present), which endeavors creating an artistic ecology within the localities of Laguna and beyond. In 2018, he became a recipient of the Thirteen Artists Awards, granted by the Cultural Center of The Philippines.
Con Cabrera (b. 1981) is a visual artist and curator, cultural worker and educator. She started joining exhibitions in 2006 and has attended curatorial workshops that mostly bring together practitioners from Asia. She embeds her work and practice into the navigation of her state as a woman enclosed by the politics of labor, the private space, and ideology while expanding to cultural work in the larger society. She is currently a faculty member in the Department of Art Studies at the University of the Philippines (UP) Diliman and guest curator at the Cultural Center of the Philippines (CCP) Visual Arts and Museum Division. She also writes for artists and exhibitions while finishing her masters in UP.
1. a·pu·là (png): pagpigil o pagsugpo sa sakít, peste, pagtulo, at katulad: DANÓLAP, HAPOLÁ Cf AMPÁT
2. First exhibition as independent curator. https://curvedhouse.wordpress.com/
3. Feelings is a drawing series of garlic and onion peelings. https://www.instagram.com/daming_feelings/
Con Cabrera (b. 1981) is a visual artist and curator, cultural worker and educator. She started joining exhibitions in 2006 and has attended curatorial workshops that mostly bring together practitioners from Asia. She embeds her work and practice into the navigation of her state as a woman enclosed by the politics of labor, the private space, and ideology while expanding to cultural work in the larger society. She is currently a faculty member in the Department of Art Studies at the University of the Philippines (UP) Diliman and guest curator at the Cultural Center of the Philippines (CCP) Visual Arts and Museum Division. She also writes for artists and exhibitions while finishing her masters in UP.
1. a·pu·là (png): pagpigil o pagsugpo sa sakít, peste, pagtulo, at katulad: DANÓLAP, HAPOLÁ Cf AMPÁT
2. First exhibition as independent curator. https://curvedhouse.wordpress.com/
3. Feelings is a drawing series of garlic and onion peelings. https://www.instagram.com/daming_feelings/